Thursday 17 January 2013

Celibacy in the Headlines

So, the spotlight's on celibacy.  Is it a fair deal for Christian gays in committed relationships with ambitions to be a C of E bishop?   We've been practising celibacy for over 30 years, and have found it a fruitful, and even "better", lifestyle choice than marriage (or indecisiveness).  Some people have just got to abandon their anachronistic objections stemming from 1521, stop fighting yesterday's battles, and realise that Protestants have been missing a trick.

We've learnt plenty along the way.  When we teach on this to our Multiply delegates it sends up sparks.  Since often their churches have a problem with Aids widows, there's a glaring contradiction here.   When, in both Africa and India, I've explained celibacy practise, it opens a new possibility for saints who are stuck in a cultural impasse.  I remember it was clearly the case for two lady church workers in Kenya, a single younger man in Rwanda who had no known immediate family, and an Indian evangelist committed to working in unreached villages.

I begin by reviewing prophetic and sacrificial signs known to serious believers.
Marriage: revealing Christ and the church;
Burial (particularly as opposed to cremation) : anticipating bodily resurrection;
Radical sharing: celebrating God's free gift of Eden, the Acts 2 enactment of Jubilee, and looking onwards to the New Earth;
Celibacy: confirming new creation and in the pattern of our eternal heavenly - not natural - relationships.

Then we have three strands of biblical precedents.

The Old Testament: Nazirites, and Isaiah’s Eunuchs

NUMBERS 6:2 "Speak to the Israelites and say to them: `If a man or woman wants to make a special vow, a vow of separation to the LORD as a Nazirite,

ISAIAH 56:3  And let not any eunuch complain, "I am only a dry tree."  4 For this is what the LORD says: "To the eunuchs who keep my Sabbaths, who choose what pleases me and hold fast to my covenant -- 5 to them I will give within my temple and its walls a memorial and a name better than sons and daughters; I will give them an everlasting name that will not be cut off.


The New Testament: Jesus’s Teaching
Marriage, Divorce and Celibacy (Matthew 19:1-13)
No Marriage in the Eternal Kingdom (Luke 20:34-38)
Jesus’ Life, and Followers (Revelation14:4)

MATTHEW 19:10 The disciples said to him, "If this is the situation between a husband and wife, it is better not to marry."  11 Jesus replied, "Not everyone can accept this word, but only those to whom it has been given. 12 For some are eunuchs because they were born that way; others were made that way by men; and others have renounced marriage because of the kingdom of heaven. The one who can accept this should accept it.”

LUKE 20:34  Jesus replied, "The people of this age marry and are given in marriage.  35 But those who are considered worthy of taking part in that age and in the resurrection from the dead will neither marry nor be given in marriage, 36 and they can no longer die; for they are like the angels.  They are God's children, since they are children of the resurrection.


The New Testament: Paul in 1 Corinthians chapter 7
  • marriage is a concession v6
  • he wishes all were like him v7
  • time is short and stressful v29
  • marriage gets in the way v26
  • the world is passing away v31
  • living in undivided devotion to the Lord v39
1 CORINTHIANS 7:32  I would like you to be free from concern.  An unmarried man is concerned about the Lord's affairs--how he can please the Lord.  33 But a married man is concerned about the affairs of this world -- how he can please his wife-- 34 and his interests are divided. An unmarried woman or virgin is concerned about the Lord's affairs: Her aim is to be devoted to the Lord in both body and spirit.

1 CORINTHIANS 7:37  But the man who has settled the matter in his own mind, who is under no compulsion but has control over his own will, and who has made up his mind not to marry the virgin -- this man also does the right thing.  38 So then, he who marries the virgin does right, but he who does not marry her does even better.


We can add the The testimony of the Church
  • Francis of Assisi
  • Thomas a Kempis
  • Mary Slessor (W. Africa)
  • David Brainerd (America);
  • Amy Carmichael (India)
  • Mother Theresa (India)
John Stott, remained unmarried.  He writes that this was through self-control, not gift (charisma).  I understood that this was to leave the possibility open to all, and to prevent pastoral confusion among any for whom it subsequently "didn't work".  His point, on which I agree, is that celibacy creates greater availability/freedom.  By this interpretation, it's not that it's "holier" (though there are hints of that in 1 Corinthians 7, together with Paul's clear use of the word gift).

On to our practise (expanded in "Seven Silver Rings", available from Jesus Fellowship resources).

It often starts with a period of committed singleness - say a year, or three, in which there's freedom to be involved in service with a clear understanding that you're not "available".  Some like to wear a white wrist band.

The stage at which more serious consideration is being given we call probationary celibacy.  Here we include a public acknowledgement that prayer and support is valued as the single person seeks God's will.  This requires good pastoral care, and is confined to those over 21 years age.  It may extend for a year to three or more depending on maturity.  There's no pressure.

I need to explain wearing a silver ring, which is optional.  Many like because it's generally worn on the third finger like an engagement or wedding ring.

We also require that single leaders being recognised as pastors should be clear in their state, i.e. faithfully married or committed celibates.

After the probationary stage, we adopt a full celibacy covenant vow, as this has been asked for by most.  Alternatively some may decline to proceed, and either be content to remain "just single" or consider marriage.  Either way, much has been added to the Kingdom by their love for all and availability to serve.

After a full commitment, the need for psycho-sexual maturing and growth in responsibility remains.  Celibacy is a positive choice for a lifestyle of sacrifice.  It's not an opt-out for those with hang-ups, or hidy-hole for those having experienced relationship breakdowns or confusion in earlier years.  Advice, counselling and friendship is available from a steering group of maturer saints with much experience and lives that most would want to imitate.

The celibate choice is available to the never-married, divorcees and widows alike.  Similarly, although most celibates live in a community house family setting, folks in their own places can make the choice.

Some celibates break their vow.  This is sad, and needs careful pastoral care whilst recognising some loss of prophetic clarity.  to I also need to add that while we actively encourage singleness and celibacy we're not prohibiting marriage (Titus 4:3).

So, it's not imposed, it's not monastic, it's not repressive.  In today's sexually over-obsessed Western culture it's a stinging counterblast.  But its heart is devotion to Jesus and His people.  Isn't that the clergy's calling anyway?

All Bible quotations are from the New International Version

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